Slow down and smell the roses. Six simple ways to start living
It is true that we live in a fast paced world. It is a very common complaint that we do not have the time. We don’t have time to really connect with people, to relax, to just be.
Our day is filled with a list of things to do, and we constantly think of the other things which are yet to be done when we are working on one. It also means that we are unable to give the complete focus on our current task.
One example could be – When we are at work we might feel that we need to spend more time with family and when we are with family we might feel that we are not spending more time at work. Overall there is a sense of dissatisfaction and disappointment in our own performance either in the day or in a time frame.
What are we running towards? A pertinent Question to ask ourselves would be, “Are we living a day at a time or are we moving towards death a day at a time”? Technically speaking, they are both the same. But when it comes to the experience of it, the difference can’t be more stark and drastic. Though technically, a glass that is half full or half empty, are the same, but our perception is completely different.
Six things that you can do to start living your life, rather than moving towards death.
1. Practice mindfulness
Mindfulness is the process of purposely bringing attention to experiences occurring in the present moment without judgment. It also could mean doing one thing at a time and focusing on that one thing and experiencing it fully. Mindfulness helps reduce stress and allows you to be present in the moment.
2. Slow down. Breathe. Take pleasure in the small things
There are 86400 seconds in a day. You can afford to breathe for a moment, and take a few deep breathes and a few moments for yourself. Look around, notice things that you have usually rushed past every day. It could be a little flower on the road side or colors of the evening sky or the smile of a child or the breeze on your face. Take notice, allow it to seep in and allow a smile to spread into you. Take pleasure in the small things around you.
3. Prioritize
Make a list of your own priorities both in terms of short term as well as long term. Also make a list of all the things that you spend time on. If you find that you are spending time on items which are not your priority either take it off your to do list or delegate to someone else appropriately.
4. Taking digital time outs
Find out how much time you spend on your mobile devices or other digital devices. You can install an app which will give you this information. Make a plan to reduce the amount of time you spend on digital media. Give yourself a digital time out. Explore the need to spend so much time on these devices. Identify what is essential and what is not.
5. Identify relationships to nurture and build
A Harvard study that was done across 75 years, tried to answer this question – What’s the secret to a happy life? Their most important finding was that – Relationships are the only things that matter in life. Without supportive, loving relationships, you’d be unhappy despite having money, fame, intelligence, career etc. Identify important relationships that you want to put in effort to nurture. This could be your family or a friend whom you may have lost touch or a friend whom you never told how much you value them. Finding time to nurture these real relationships can be a fulfilling and rewarding initiative.
6. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude is the feeling of being thankful, a feeling of appreciation which is different from indebtedness, where you feel obligated to pay it back. If you really look inwards and around yourselves, you will find so many things to feel gratitude for. Its a choice that you have a practice that can become a habit. It can over all enhance your happiness levels and reduce your stress responses.
These small steps will enable you to appreciate the little and big things in your life and around you and experience true living rather than going through the motions.
Let us slow down and smell the roses.
About the Author:
Kala Balasubramanian is a certified Counselling Psychologist and Psychotherapist with a Masters in Counselling and Psychotherapy, Diplomas in Counselling and has further certifications specializing in couple/marriage/relationship counselling and family counselling. As a trained therapist, she provides professional and confidential – face to face Counselling in Bangalore including Individual counselling and Couples counselling / Marriage counselling in Bangalore and Online Counselling over video calls for others residing outside Bangalore and abroad.
Reach us at +919632146316 or write to us at counselor@innerdawn.in. Counselling in Bangalore is provided face to face – in person. For out station requirements, we provide online counselling over video calls.