Ways to build strong social connections
One of the latest epidemics that we as a society are facing is that of loneliness. Research suggests that feeling lonely can be as damaging as having 15 cigarettes a day. So what can we do? How do we address this loneliness epidemic?
No matter what your age is, what stage of life you are it, it is possible that you may experience loneliness. Let me be clear, it is not the same thing as being alone. Some people prefer to be alone and enjoy their Solitude. Loneliness is felt then a person’s need for connections is not matched up in reality, causing them pain in the process. And the growing fascination and excessive usage of mobile devices, social media, online content etc damages real world connections even more.
It does not mean that you need to be a social butterfly or the center of attraction everywhere. It is possible that you are in the middle of a large group of people, like your friends or family and still feel lonely. It is possible that you are in a relationship and still feel lonely. You might be surrounded by your spouse and your children and still feel disconnected.
As I had mentioned in my previous article, research shows that one of the key factors that determine healthier and happier lives is strong social connections.
We spend a lot of time in our life gathering material possessions, wealth, power, experiences and knowledge. I agree that all these are very important. At the same time, it is also very important that we make, nourish and nurture strong and meaningful connections too.
Let us look at different ways and aspects of building these strong social connections.
- Build Strong bonds with your Family
You try to be a nice and polite to so many people in your life. Be it your boss, colleagues, acquaintances and so on. But many times it happens that, the family is taken for granted. If you can try to be nice, polite, loving, caring towards your own spouse and children, your siblings, cousins, try to spend quality time with them, and show it to them explicitly how much they mean to you, how special they are to you, then these bonds will go a long way in keeping your foundation strong.
- Reconnect with friends and nurture some valuable relationships
Maybe you have been thinking of talking to that friend of yours, that you have not been in touch with for quite a while. Make time for such friendships that you really value but, you haven’t made an effort for a long time now. Even if you have been in touch, if you want to have a more deeper and meaningful friendship then it is time that you invest some effort and energy into it.
- Connect with yourself
One very important person that you forget to connect with and many times you don’t even realize it, is yourself. Over a period of time, it is important to learn to have and enjoy some alone time at the same time not feel lonely. This “some” time is very important to rejuvenate and to get back into the world with renewed vigor. This could be a solo travel, or it could be 15 minutes of undisturbed me time. But the key is reconnect with yourself.
- Do not ignore people around you like neighbors and colleagues
Smile, greet, make conversations which your neighbors and colleagues. This may neither be very deep conversations nor be gossip sessions. Or they may be deep conversations. Sometimes even making a pleasant eye contact and a nod could be a valuable acknowledgement and a positive stroke.
- Get involved
Get involved in some social cause that is close to your heart. Interacting with people who have very similar thought process or mind set, could really make you feel good, and have sense of belonging.
- Don’t expect that everyone that you try to connect with will respond
Every person that you are trying to connect with will have their own set of life circumstances that they are going through. It is possible that some of them may not be as enthusiastic to connect back with you and you need to be ok with that. Do not have very high expectations that everybody will respond back to you the same way you would like to connect with them.
- Do not jump to conclusions or make judgments about others quickly
You may find people behaving in a certain number which you may not like or approve of. When you jump to conclusions about them, or when you judge them, it becomes very difficult for you to change your opinion about them later on. Give them a benefit of doubt, at the same time keep your eyes open.
- Maintain safe boundaries in every relationship
Though you may want to establish stronger and deeper connections with others, ensure that you stay safe by maintaining your comfortable boundaries, which you think are appropriate to the corresponding relationship.
- Ask for support as needed
When there is a need, it is OK to ask for support from the people that you trust. Sometimes relying upon others could be a significant acknowledgement of their presence and importance in your life. Do take into account their circumstances and capacity to support you as well.