I would try to give you a sense of what the therapy / counselling process would be like. This is our latest video on our YouTube channel. Here is the verbatim of this video in this article.

1. What happens in Counselling / Therapy process

Counselling is a safe space where you can express yourself openly and without any hesitation because there is no judgement from the therapist. You are accepted by the therapist as you are.

And what you share in the counselling process would be strictly confidential. Having said that confidentiality has certain limits and you will told upfront what those circumstances could be.

I usually tell my clients

Confidentiality does not apply
– If there is any risk to your life or safety or for anyone else.
– If there is evidence or suspicion of Child or Elder abuse  Etc
– If you are being sponsored by your organization from your EAP, do read your company EAP policy additionally.
– It is important that you understand the process and terms before you provide your Informed Consent to the process.

2. So what really happens in the therapy session?

Of course you will talk and share a lot about yourself and what you are going through your thoughts your emotions your circumstances in the process.  Your therapist would listen to you actively and ask you specific questions, or highlight certain aspects in your narrative or what you are not talking about as well.

Your unhelpful beliefs may emerge allowing you to challenge them. You may experience and explore your deeper emotions and experiences.

Therapy can involve restructuring of your thoughts and beliefs or  reorganizing your emotional experiences or even making sense of your bodily affect – all this depends upon what is that you are looking for from the therapy process.

So your consent, agency and your power is always with you and is paramount in the process.

3. So how is therapy different from talking to a friend or close one?

Therapy is a purposeful process. It is a professional relationship, that is genuine, warm and  that gets built between the client and the therapist. Most part of therapy would be in the form of conversations with your therapist. Having said that this will be different from your relationship or a conversation with a friend or any one else.

Here the both of you would be focused on you and the goals that you want to set for yourself. The intent of the therapy process would be to facilitate your understanding of your own self better your circumstances better to learn or build those skills and resources so that you can make changes and move towards a goals of your choice.

Therapy can be a supportive process but you will also be gently challenged in the process towards awareness, health and growth.

4. How do you set goals in the therapy process?

It is a good idea to have a fair sense of what you are looking for from the therapy process before you start. Most people usually know that. Having said that sometimes it is possible that initially you may not be 100% sure but the therapist would help you arrive at a point of clarity so that both of you will have a clear understanding of what you are working towards.  EOD you will set your goals in collaboration with the therapist make them realistic and achievable.

5. What do you do in the process?

Therapy a collaborative process. You and your therapist work together as a team. And it is important that you are actively engaged in the process. Therapist does not do anything to you or change you. Your therapist does not offer solutions or advice but enables you to arrive at the solutions that are right for you.  The idea is that you not just arrive at solutions for your current problem but also you gain skills and resources to deal with future problems as well.  

6. What happens in between sessions?

Therapy is not just that one hour that you spend with your therapist every week or every fortnight. The process also continues in between sessions. You may be asked to think about certain things or introspect or to an activity or a homework, or experiment with the new behaviour etc. As I Said before your involvement, engagement and motivation are key success factors in therapy.

7. What to do once you have decided to talk to a therapist or counsellor?

If you have made the choice to meet a therapist, my suggestion for you would be to be first be comfortable with the therapist.  Be open to ask any questions or clarifications that you may have initially or at any point in therapy. And if you are, then be as open and involved as possible in the process.  End of day it is your decision, power and agency to seek changes towards growth.

If you like this video – do like and subscribe to our channel. you can watch the video here

In my next video I will talk about how to choose the therapist who is right for me.

About the Author:

Kala Balasubramanian is a certified Counselling Psychologist and Psychotherapist with a Masters in Counselling and Psychotherapy, Diplomas in Counselling and has further certifications specializing in couple/marriage/relationship counselling and family counselling. She is trained in different modalities like CBT, Gestalt, NLP, Family Systems Therapy, TA etc. As a trained therapist, she provides professional and confidential counselling services including Individual counselling and Couples counselling / Marriage counselling.

Currently with the COVID-19 situation, all counselling services are offered online over video calls. Reach us at +91 9632146316 or write to us at counselor@innerdawn.in

The post What really happens in therapy / counselling first appeared on Inner Dawn Counselling.

No this is not a trick question.

I have so many clients and potential clients ask me this question – will counselling work for me? How will it work if you will not give solutions? I am not able to solve my problem, that’s why I have come to you, so you need to tell me what I need to do. What is the potential success rate? How many clients have you been successful in changing?

And I usually tell them, a professional Counselor doesn’t claim to solve your problems, doesn’t offer any instant solutions, or instruct you specifically what you need to do to address your issue.

Lets think of the counselling process like a gymnasium. There are different devices, different machines, work out systems that are available there in the gym. That is also a gym instructor who tells you which machine can be used in what way to achieve what kind of result that you are looking for. The result that you are looking for could be weight loss, muscle building, fitness, endurance etc.

You can get to know the equipment the muscle groups to work upon with respect each equipment, diet that needs to be taken etc that are specific to your goals. But the effort that is needed to work out and actual workout will need to be done by you. Even when you are outside the gym what you do with respect to your health, be it food, other activities that you engage in etc, all determine whether you are able to accomplish your goals are not. The instructor can provide the technical know how, the approach, the methodologies, knowledge skills etc, but can’t make you lose weight or build muscles as you may prefer.

Similarly the counselling process helps you work on your thoughts, emotions, behavior, and build the corresponding muscles, or lose weight in the appropriate areas, by providing the right environment and acceptance. You and your counsellor work together as a team, where your counselor brings on to the table appropriate, tools, techniques, methodologies and understanding of the human psychology and behavior. Given this warm, non judging environment of acceptance, it enables the client to strive and try to accomplish their goals by using these approaches.

Counselling as a Process, helps you understand your situation better, from different perspectives, manage your emotions, understand your own self better – your strengths, your weaknesses, the resources that you need to deal with the situation, be it internal resources or external resources, to find ways of accessing these resources, so that you can take decisions in a informed manner with clarity, consider different options that are possible, and take relevant action as appropriate.

Unless the client wants to make the change to happen no Counselor or therapist can really make them change. So, NO, the therapist does not change the client. The therapist only acts as a facilitator for the process of change, and sometimes could be a catalyst, but the actual change needs to and will happen by the choice of the client, and that is the only way for it to really be a transformation, which will last.

About the Author:

Kala Balasubramanian is certified Counselling Psychologist/Psychotherapist with a Masters in Counselling and Psychotherapy, Diplomas in Counselling and has further certifications specializing in couple/marriage/relationship counselling and family counselling.  She provides a supportive, understanding, professional and confidential environment to work with clients – Individuals and Couples explore their emotions, help them understand and manage their challenges, relationships and stress better.

The post Will counselling really work for me ? first appeared on Inner Dawn Counselling.