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It is an established fact across different roles/designations/Companies across the globe that pressure and stress levels have consistently been on the upward move. And it is also established that loneliness is the next major Global epidemic again across age groups.

The recent indicated suicide of CCD founder VG Siddhartha has sent shock waves across the spectrum of corporates as well as the commoners who have ever experienced coffee at the CCD chain of outlets.  

Talking specifically about senior management, CxOs, owners of large organisations,  the entrepreneurs who have just launched their start up, or wanting to grow their Ventures, it is a great deal of stress that they shoulder from various quarters.

For the outside world, though they seem highly accomplished and successful, which they may be, the daily dose of massive challenges that they face could be daunting.

Some of the reasons why they feel that there is no way out, how some of these challenges / failures push them towards acts of self harm and suicide.

Challenges are high and asking for support is difficult.

The challenges that they face are myriad at the same time if those challenges are handled in the right way, it can be very fulfilling.  These challenges need to be faced on an everyday basis and there is no scope for failure for them, or at least that is the belief that many hold on to.  Though support is available, there is a hesitation to ask for support.

Pride, Guilt and Shame

When they are responsible for their shareholders, their employees, organisation for continuously delivering results, profits and growth, it becomes a huge sense of shame and guilt, when faced with failure / inability to deliver, hurting the sense of pride, leading to real or perceived humiliation which becomes too much to bear.

It is Lonely at the top

Though it is a cliché, it is also fairly true.  The higher they are in an organization the less the number of people that they can openly share challenges with.  Competition is tough and there is a need to be wary of people who might take advantage of the situation.  Having someone to have a heart to heart talk, to share insecurities, apprehensions, to speak out fears who would really understand where they are coming from is a rarity. 

Mental health and other health issues

Chronic and long-term stress and stress response have been found to possibly give rise to mental health issues like anxiety / depression etc. It is also true that this leads to different kinds of physical ailments as well, adding more to the stress of the person. Though there has been some movement in seeking support for mental health issues, we still have a long way to go, to not let the stigma stop one from accessing the right kind of help needed.

Constant need to stay connected and inability to switch off

The drive, need for perfection, dogged pursuit, focus, high performance etc that all considered to be great traits for an entrepreneur or a CxO, also can lead to burn out and difficulties to deal with failures in many situations.  The need to be constantly on top of things, and unable to switch off or make time for them, deprives them of a recharge and to replenish their own personal sense of Wellness.

Feeling Helpless and hopeless

When Challenges seem insurmountable, and all efforts to address the challenges seem to go down the drain, a sense of helplessness and hopelessness builds within. And even when there are possible avenues available, they all seem futile and inaccessible because they are seen through the lenses of hopelessness.

Though there are no simple answers to complex problems, there still are certain things that we can do that are universally applicable to every one of us, from CEOs to beginners.

1. To be able to see yourself of intrinsic value and worth, rather than only a reflection of the accomplishments in life or the challenges and failures that you have faced.

2. Seek the right kind of help and support needed.  Some support can come from family and friends. But you might need more support from a Legal advisor, a financial support group, a trusted mentor, a therapist or a coach etc.  Ask for help from relevant people, and if you don’t have the right person around you, seek them out. Asking for help is strength not weakness.

3. Take time out for self care and rejuvenation.  Have a ready set of healthy avenues for self care.  It could be meditation, mindfulness, Yoga, exercise, travel, being in nature, music and so on.  Find out what works for you and replenish yourself, physically, mentally and emotionally.

4. Have a good team to back you up. Building a team that you can trust and rely upon is essential to share your responsibilities and burden. Have people around you who can take bottom-line on their parts.

5.  You as a whole are greater than the sum of your parts. You may play the roles of a Owner/CeO/CxO/Entrepreneur, parent, son/daughter, boss, sibling and so on.  You as a whole are more important than all the roles that you play.

I close with a quote from Rudyard Kipling’s famous poem – “If”

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;  
    If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;  
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;  
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
    And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:
…..
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,  
    And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

And that is for a Woman too.

About the Author:

Kala Balasubramanian is a certified Counselling Psychologist and Psychotherapist with a Masters in Counselling and Psychotherapy, Diplomas in Counselling and has further certifications specializing in couple/marriage/relationship counselling and family counselling. As a trained therapist, she provides professional and confidential – face to face Counselling in Bangalore including Individual counselling and Couples counselling / Marriage counselling in Bangalore and Online Counselling over video calls for others residing outside Bangalore and abroad.

Reach us at +919632146316 or write to us at counselor@innerdawn.in